How to run a white elephant gift swap

White elephant is the gift swap where nobody knows what they'll go home with. Everyone brings one wrapped gift, the gifts go in a pile, and players take turns either opening a new gift or stealing one somebody already opened. It works for families, friend groups and offices, and it's at its best when the gifts are a mix of useful, silly and slightly baffling.

The basic rules

1. Everyone brings one wrapped gift. Agree on a price limit first, so nobody shows up with a gift card while someone else brings a rubber chicken.
2. Put every gift in one pile. Wrapping hides what's inside, which is the whole point.
3. Draw numbers for turn order. Player 1 picks a gift from the pile and opens it for everyone to see.
4. Each next player chooses: open a new gift from the pile, or steal an opened gift from someone else.
5. A player who gets robbed chooses again. They can open a new gift or steal from someone else, but usually not the gift that was just taken from them.
6. The game ends when every gift is open. Many groups give player 1 one last chance to swap at the end, since they never got to steal.

Decide these before the party

• The price limit. $20 to $30 is common for families and friends. Offices often go lower.
• How many times a gift can be stolen. Three steals is the usual limit. After the third steal, that gift is "frozen" and stays with whoever has it.
• Whether you can steal back right away. Most groups say no, so two people can't trade one gift back and forth forever.
• Whether player 1 gets a final swap. It makes up for going first with nothing to steal.
• Gag gifts, yes or no. Some groups love them. Others want every gift to be something a person would actually keep.

Tips that keep it fun

• Keep turns moving. A quick "open or steal?" from the host stops the game stalling.
• Show every gift off. When a gift is opened, hold it up so everyone can decide whether it's worth stealing.
• Bring a spare gift. Someone always forgets, and a spare keeps them in the game.
• Playing remotely? Mail the gifts ahead of time and open them together on a video call. Everyone still gets the moment of seeing what's inside.

Yankee swap and Dirty Santa

You'll hear the same game called Yankee swap or Dirty Santa. The core is the same: open or steal. The differences are in the details, like steal limits and the final swap, so decide your house rules once and write them down before the first gift is opened.